Unspoken Words.

You told me of all the good things you've been doing with yourself, and I told you of all the good things I've been doing. We spoke of old memories- ones that I've long forgotten. (How could I forget?) Each of us taking two different paths in life, leading us in two different directions. (Where will I be the next time we speak? Where will you have gone the next time we meet?) For so long, I've been angry with you for what you've done to us. For so long I've been hiding away from the world because of what I've done to us. I never did tell you the truth. (I don't know why.) The truth, I almost forgot all about it. (But how can I start brand new when you're still a part of me?) I forgot how happy I was when I found you, I forgot how happy I was when I was with you. I never forgot how destroyed I've been since we stopped speaking. I will never forget how hard it was just now to tell you the truth. You always appeared to be a far better person than I was, and because of that, I knew there was hope that I'd some day be like you. But I'm not you. I'm only me, and I've made many mistakes. I'm sorry.

"Memories, like the corners of my mind. Misty water-colored memories, of the way we were," we used to sing this. Every song we used to sing together. On long road-trips we had our own playlist. Together, just you and I; taking over the world, is what I thought. I remember some of it now. Playing baseball in the park, sitting under the sun, holding my hand down the street. Things I have yet been able to replace. You told me just now, "these things are irreplaceable, but in time I'll find something better." I hope you're right because I've been waiting. I've been searching. I haven't found it.

Talking to you is like scratching off a scab from a wound that hasn't fully healed. It hurts, it stings, and it bleeds a bit. I forgot how nice it was just speaking to you. We used to always have things to talk about. Adventures that we'd like to encounter, places we'd like to see, and the things we'd one day do. (How could I forget?) I almost forgot you, and that is the truth. I've been trying so hard to delete you from my life, but somehow you never go. Even your silence I have missed.

I remember you now. The person you have become is not the person you were. Though your heart has grown cold, I know somewhere, deep down, you haven't forgotten me. (Will you ever?) I hope you don't. Two years of my life, most have told me it was a waste with you. I believed everyone for quite some time. I don't believe that anymore. You're not the same... But neither am I.

All these feelings, I never told you. All these thoughts from this past year, I have not shared with you. I wish you had more to feel, so then you would have more to say. We've run out of words this time.

My last words to you, are really my last words to you. The next time we speak, will be far from now, and I hope to share many new stories with you, as I know you will with me.